Skip to content

Man v Woman: Reconciling the Masculine/Feminine Dichotomy

I am sorry. For what little it’s worth, I apologize to all women for the ways in which this world have been oriented to essentially cause you suffering from the moment you’re born. Even institutionalized childbirth is a distortion of the beautiful, simple, sacred and natural… merely one chapter in the vast historical dark and dysfunctional narrative that is Man v Woman. I, and all men, have also suffered greatly because of it — though few would likely admit to it, nor realize just how deeply the wound goes for us all.

In this article, I continue my attempt to explore and examine some of the intricacies of “Man v Woman” — or perhaps more accurately, the disparate nature and ancient contest of masculine and feminine energies. In a previous article, I explored a very personal angle, which itself merits additional discussion and writings. However, my intentions are never simply self-serving; I am always keen to unravel and make sense of these age-old conflicts, as they reside within me, and within all of us to some degree.

I write this today from a perspective of a certain heaviness in my heart. It seems increasingly difficult to not only meet someone, but to genuinely connect — at least, not without addressing the proverbial elephant in the room. Perhaps it’s just my meager effort at dispelling an adopted guilt and shame from my fathers, brothers, and complicit sisters. Attempting to cross the span built upon layers of pain, inequity, misunderstanding and the general malaise of countless centuries is daunting, and I’m not sure that I can really do it justice. Every single step is a lifetime’s journey, but an essential movement toward reconciliation.

Nothing meaningful — fundamental, structural, systemic — will come about quickly, yet everything must be examined with increasingly open and informed eyes. Inevitably, I believe that romance and intimacy flounder and fall into complexity because, for those such as myself, aspects of the relationship with the one represent relationship with the whole — not as a generalization, but as an intention toward mutual development of character, elevated coexistence and collective integrity.

. . .

Man’s world of war, business, and progress desperately, yet insubstantially, propels itself forward — brazenly, blindly against the obvious harm it continues to do to our humanity, the enduring human spirit and psychology, and our singular, fine planet. It is revealing that profit is their unifying god, a force unparalleled in transcending dogma, ideology, nationality, language, and race; every would-be modern prophet is certain that this road we’re on will inevitably lead to oblivion. It is clear that we are in the stages of collapse, though we’re woefully uneducated and ill-prepared. To be blunt, the simple fact that focal players such as today’s corrupted banksters and blathering, inept politicians are standing behind pulpits and party banners, rather than in prison, is evidence enough; the people are afraid, disorganized, and fragmented in purpose.

Anarchy isn’t an answer, of course, yet apathy and antipathy are leading us unabated toward the end of all our conveniences. True and lasting innovation will only materialize from the ground up — literally; in harmony with the planet, in concert with all nations, and with mature, restorative, regenerative considerations — regardless of where, why and how we choose to develop our current and future presence on the Earth.

With the advent of blockchain and related technologies, everyone is racing to create a new money system, new government, new everything… predicated on transparency, honesty and egalitarian goals. The idealism is impressive, but it doesn’t address systemic problems that are as ancient as recorded history, nor the unripened psychologies and philosophies informing their rapid development; real solutions are multi-faceted and multi-layered, and MUST conceptually distance themselves from our historical ignorance and failures, yet not ignore them. Until we’re ready to approach our issues from a broader, all-inclusive standpoint (one species; one family, many parts), we cannot know what’s best to do on an individual level, where all meaningful change and progress must begin. We’ll just keep guessing, celebrating and embracing trends, while wasting resources and time.

. . .

A global surge of changemakers, researchers, philosophers, educators, creators, activists, and innovators are racing to ally, collaborate, and to build communities of like-minded actors and producers. The churned waters are somewhat murky, yet this is a beautiful thing to observe, as we birth a generation of inspired creativity, regenerative enterprises, and epoch-defining endeavors. While the jury is certainly still out — and may not return for a hundred years — there is incredible momentum in this era.

The internet and concurrent network effects are vastly superior in assisting our global, social integration to anything we’ve seen in the past. It’s still in its infancy, but there is significant promise. The mania of tech startups will eventually crash — as these myopic, sandboxed experiments always do — but along with the systemic self-correction (as there will be in real estate, finance, energy production and politics), the world’s community will benefit from a few select, if not marginal improvements. Lasting change requires monumental, sustained, patient (i.e., mothering; caring, protective, kind; feminine) effort, and a lot of time — in stark contrast to how quickly we can do damage and harm at remarkable scale.

Exponential and rapid change can and does happen, yet in addition to the aforementioned, it would require the redirection and reclamation of subtle forces at play deep within the framework of human consciousness… a complex and important discussion in its own right. I believe it to be the essential, energetic construct that transcends and encompasses simply memetic or epistemological considerations.

Back on the ground, many are uniting under the flag of climate crisis, which is an increasingly broad and timely one. Regardless of the science and politics of it, the groundswell of motivated, emotionally charged activity is nudging the collective consciousness away from wasteful, earth-damaging practices in all areas of modern life. The trickle-up effect is affecting the most powerful of factors in all commerce: the buyer’s considerations and habits. This, too, is evidence of a significant, corrective adjustment away from traditional, masculine ideals — and will most certainly demand a cohesive, less competitive, communal, caring and comprehensive approach.

It has nothing to do with “fighting” climate change, but rather addressing our capacity for fighting and violence in general; if we persist in aggression, unconscious social polarization, and fueling the ancient fires of fear and scarcity, we will surely burn the table at which our most sacred energies are now willing and able to sit beside.

Reconciliation is a yin-yang affair. It is the broader understanding that all life is a blend and seemingly precarious balance of what we’d distinguish — perhaps too simplistically — as masculine and feminine. These vast, creative forces are ineffably complementary, and should be valued, represented and understood as such.

Solvitur ambulando