Echoes of our childhood carry on throughout our lives without the careful and rigorous work of recognition, acceptance, mirroring, integrating and elevating ourselves into the world beyond those self-centered boundaries and limitations.
The nature of our cognitive process inherently creates feedback loops, to the point of forming blinding, inhibiting closed-loop scenarios; we perpetuate unconscious ignorance, suffering, and struggle based on what we believe ourselves to be “right” about, and that righteousness is frequently misused, misaligned and misinformed. When in the defensive posture, our greater intellect (and thus access to any all-knowing essence locked within us) is subdued for our mind’s or body’s preservation and protection from a perceived threat – something reminiscent of events that occurred long ago.
Then, our outer world must be employed in an effort for our dependence upon influencers and authorities to provide insights, observations and critical data with which we may give ourselves permission to infer, discern and, finally, to act. You can see how this can be problematic. Trust in our instincts, intuitions, impulses and inner compass is required for us to ever know solace, founded on our truths – regardless of the veracity of the claims of those who share their perspectives or heartfelt opinions. Yes, objectivity helps, but it comes loaded with bias. No, subjectivity isn’t always flawed, but it tends to be honest, if not inaccurate; emotions may mislead our judgment. Our conditions and programs are most likely to be the issue, and nothing from without can address that which resides squarely within.
We may never fully appreciate the way in which another is struggling with the weight of life, according to their journey. We will presume to understand, taking offense if and when our feelings are inadvertently bruised, but in a culture that values self-empowerment, self-sufficiency, self-direction and self-preservation, getting to the core of the problem requires a gentle presence, and a patient, open heart. We must learn again how to listen.
In this way, we may offer ourselves the very same gift.